Years ago, when I had an MRI of my brain that indicated a large number of MS lesions, I was afraid how that would affect my memory. I wrote family histories, of my parents, my grandparents, and the kids’ father, who has been gone for twelve years.
I felt there might come a time when they would want to know the family history, the stories, and I wanted to preserve that for them.
More than seven years ago I started making a cookbook. I took all the family recipes, and those that had been tried and true family favourites, and made a cookbook, scrapbook style. Each page was colourful and often included photos and anecdotes. I then photocopied the original, four times, and put each copy in a plastic sleeve in binders.
Each binder had a personal cover page for each child, and would be theirs for their adult years. Their mothers use the books now, so the kids will know those recipes.
When I had two more grandchildren born, a month apart, I had to play catch-up and create a book for each of the new arrivals. I added to the books for the next few years, but as I haven’t cooked much in the last two years, rarely bake anymore, there have been no new additions.
I have this great need to know the grandchildren will remember me. Sad that I feel I could be so easily forgotten. I guess it’s because I can’t be the active fun grandmother I would have hoped to be. As my MS progresses, I feel like I’m fading away from their lives.
Last week when I did some filing and shredding of personal records, I found a number of recipe pages I have completed but not yet copied for the grandchildren’s books. Colour photocopying is so expensive, I think I’ll try the scanner feature on my printer, see what kind of job it does and how the cost of ink compares with photocopying.
I guess I’m not done yet.